I was blessed with many things, in fact I'm pretty much a bundle of maracles, but a perfect brace of wisdom teeth was not one of them. Yes, my teeth were pretty much coming in all fucking sideways until just recently. Wednesday of this week, I went to have my wisdom teeth removed from my head, bringing the total number of teeth excommunicated from my skull to nine. Since I dont have anything better to do than just sit here and heal, I guess I'll tell you all about it.

Before the doctor came in, I sat in the chair talking to a nurse. She suddenly told me to take off my sweatshirt.

"Well. Absolutely. I wore this because I knew how cold it was in this office" I said to her. "...last time I was here I wore a T-shirt and froze."

"I can get you a blanket if you want. But you won't care what we do to you once you’re under." She responded.

Perhaps that statement would alarm me at certain other times or under different circumstances; however this time, noting the appearance of the nurse, (in fact all the nurses at this particular clinic) I was not the slightest bit mortified.

"No. I won’t." I said to myself. "I’ll take the blanket only on the condition that you’ll come under it with me." I said aloud. Damn it.

The nurse squawked an awkward laugh and hesitated before asking me to lift my shirt so she could put the last little heart monitor sticker on my stomach.

The doctor came in.

"I’m going to put your arm in this brace to keep you from bending it."

"You don’t have to worry about that, I’m not squeamish with needles" I thought.

"Open and close your fist. Hm, you have very large veins, it would be hard to miss that one", and the doc proceeded to shoot smack into it. "It will hit you suddenly." he said.

After the serum was administered, I chuckled at the hopelessness of my consciousness. I remember trying to find an inappropriate goodbye for the doctor and his assistants before it was too late, but apparently my body reacts to Versed, Demerol, Robinol, Ketamine, and Profol faster than I can come up with something witty.

Immediately after I woke up I asked the oscillating body of a nurse for the before and after x-ray of my mouth. My arm was being dragged to a recovery area, and my body was annoyed to have to follow. I remember being slightly angered that the helpers treated my like such a child. Ironically, objecting to this patronization in this particular clinic made still more nurses come to my assistance, contrary to my wishes. From the waiting area I asked the nurse again for the before and after X-Ray pictures of my mouth a few more times while she begged me to sit down. After a few tense moments she said I could keep the before x-ray and 3 of my teeth if I sat down and waited patiently. From my mothers own testimony this sounded reasonable enough to me, and I followed orders. After the pointless wait of several seconds, the doc came over and asked me how I felt. I told him that I would like the before and after pictures of my mouth about another 4 times. Then I asked him for what I was "put down" with. He listed the reagents for me and I was somewhat satisfied.

Anyway, go eat some crap or something, 'cause I don't feel very good so you might as well not feel good either. That logic came directly from the extra brain I'm growing in my giant swollen cheeks.

-Steve

Anyone still out there?

I'll take those cricket sounds as a "yes".

So, I'd like to start using the site a bit more again. You see, my hosting plan will not last forever, people, so I need to have a reason to renew my plan when it comes up for renewal. So far, my only reason is that it is someone nice to have an FTP server. But is that alone really worth it!? I just don't know, so throw me a bone here people, and let me know what I could do with the good old BigBrickWall. We had some good times together, let's bring back Big Brick Wall.

Hm, some nice alteration there.

~Krusz